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Post by Deleted on Jul 9, 2020 1:53:45 GMT 1
Those damn meddling police, always getting in the way of my heists. I just want to steal in peace! They keep discriminating criminals
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Jul 12, 2020 23:38:16 GMT 1
My mental state when someone's trying to teach me math.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 12, 2020 23:44:24 GMT 1
If you want something to smile about, go put some laxatives in the office coffee machine
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Post by Grandmaster on Jul 13, 2020 7:09:43 GMT 1
There should be a pill to cure Mondays.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Jul 15, 2020 0:35:00 GMT 1
Sometimes I randomly think of alternate names the Ackbars could use, such as...
Ackbar Bar Binks
Conan the Ackbarbarian
Ackba ba ba ba Barbara Ann
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Post by Grandmaster on Jul 15, 2020 10:27:20 GMT 1
Melons
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Post by AQUA SALZ! on Jul 16, 2020 15:49:47 GMT 1
What do you do?
I'm in a bank.
High up in a bank? Or just sitting in a cage totting up things?
Oh, quite high up, really. It's a very good bank.
I'm so glad.
How lovely you are.
No, no, that came later – you've skipped some.
Sorry.
You're nice and thin – your eyes are funny – you move easily – I'm afraid you're terribly attractive.
You never said that.
No, but I thought it.
Stick to the script.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2020 5:51:26 GMT 1
DO THE MARIO! SWING YOUR ARMS FROM SIDE TO SIDE! COME ON, IT'S TIME TO GO!
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Post by Grandmaster on Jul 26, 2020 15:50:23 GMT 1
I had to stop defrosting my freezer. Its a archological dig site now. They said they could open a parc with long lost creatures in a few months.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2020 2:18:02 GMT 1
If you want to slap someone, slap them with a medium-sized fish. Too little, slap isnt shocking enough. Too big (tuna) will cause you some back pain and by the time you try and hit them, they will already have karate kicked you in the face
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Post by equality72521 on Jul 27, 2020 3:39:39 GMT 1
I like grapes.
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Post by Grandmaster on Jul 27, 2020 16:06:10 GMT 1
So I was at the club the other day and ordered a cream pie. Now shitting is uneasy.
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Post by equality72521 on Jul 28, 2020 3:03:48 GMT 1
1, 2, 3:00 4:00 rock
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Post by Deleted on Jul 29, 2020 4:06:40 GMT 1
The baby stegosaurus leapt onto the table and proceeded to eat the house plant. Afterwards, it mooed and took a dump on the chair
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Post by equality72521 on Jul 30, 2020 2:50:00 GMT 1
The word, "carpenter" comes from the Latin word for wagon
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Post by AQUA SALZ! on Jul 30, 2020 3:41:21 GMT 1
Exclamation mark, or exclamation point?
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2020 14:25:06 GMT 1
"Sometimes you gotta burn some police cars." -Ellen
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Post by Grandmaster on Jul 30, 2020 14:35:41 GMT 1
Public transport without a mask sucks. With a mask its harder to suck but yet it sucks harder.
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Post by equality72521 on Jul 30, 2020 16:34:15 GMT 1
Exclamation mark, or exclamation point? X marks the spot or points to it?
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Post by equality72521 on Jul 30, 2020 16:35:11 GMT 1
Carnies smell like cabbage
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2020 7:04:12 GMT 1
Do you feel not so fresh? Do cocaine. Just do it
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Post by equality72521 on Aug 1, 2020 8:40:22 GMT 1
Morena Baccarin... yum
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Post by Grandmaster on Aug 1, 2020 22:12:42 GMT 1
Its the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.
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Post by equality72521 on Aug 2, 2020 3:45:32 GMT 1
Are those velociraptors talking to each other?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 6, 2020 2:05:06 GMT 1
Its the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 6, 2020 2:07:46 GMT 1
Have you been fishing? No, I mean real fishing. Fighting a shark in the water and if you win, feasting off it's bountiful carcass. If you're not risking your life then it's not real fishing
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Post by equality72521 on Aug 6, 2020 12:59:59 GMT 1
7 x 7 = 49
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Post by Grandmaster on Aug 6, 2020 13:39:47 GMT 1
Who turned on the heat outside?
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Post by equality72521 on Aug 6, 2020 16:15:49 GMT 1
Rainy days and Mondays... something something
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Aug 10, 2020 22:46:15 GMT 1
I seriously injured the heel of my left foot, and as a result I'm now limping.
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