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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 2, 2022 1:13:02 GMT 1
Note: Unlike with my Riverdale and Agent Carter episode reviews, I won't be doing reviews for EVERY episode of X: WP. Most likely I'll just be reviewing the ones which feature the character of Callisto (since she's a favourite of mine). Though I may, on occasion, feel inclined to review other non-Callisto episodes...it'll just depend on whether I'm in the right mood to do so). So without further ado, here's my first review... Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 1, Episode 22: 'Callisto'. Callisto: Warrior Queen... **spoilers below** Having grown tired of/frustrated with current TV shows' agendas/mandates, it's nice to return to a simpler time (when shows could just be shows) thanks to X: WP repeats airing on TV here. I haven’t seen these early episodes since the days of buying them on VHS (I missed out on getting the first two seasons on DVD, so these repeats are the only way I can see them). And I’m SO glad I finally got to relive the episode that introduces one of my Top 5 TV characters EVER (no, not Joxer). Things open in pretty dramatic fashion with a village burning and people being slaughtered by a flash of black leather & blonde hair that even a child doesn’t escape the wrath of (though whether he actually DIES is unclear, since he seemed to be dead dead, but then opened his eyes which indicated he was only mostly dead. However, later Melas talks about losing a son…were they the same kid?). ANYway, what matters the most in the opening scene is how the incomparable Hudson Leick commands the screen from the very moment we first get a good look at her. The way she addresses an old woman as “You old crone” (before telling her to pass on the message that Xena is the one they have to thank for all this destruction) amused me. This is a classic frame job and character assassination of Xena’s reputation she’s trying so hard to redeem. Consequently, when she introduces herself to Melas, he wants her blood as payback...and he sure doesn’t give up easily, even when Xena bests him without breaking a sweat on more than one occasion. His main purpose it to be the catalyst to Gabrielle's ‘break the cycle of hate/vengeance’ big speech later on. The introduction of Callisto is memorable for a number of reasons, but mostly for bringing Hudson Leick to my attention when I originally watched it on TV. Many have played psychos, but none of them quite like ‘Psycho Barbie’ (as I once saw her described). Leick, as with Heath Ledger in TDK, gives us an R-rated performance in what's otherwise PG-rated. Seriously, you wonder how they got away with such a dark character in a series that also includes such goofiness/silliness. What Leick does is more than play a psycho mirror version of Xena. She adds many layers/creates complexity within this self-described ‘monster with integrity’. She's as beautiful as she is evil, trains with her men like Xena did in her debut episode of H: TLJ, (but on ladders!), her primal scream is a twisted alternate take on Xena’s war cry, she hisses like a feral cat on multiple occasions, leaves Xena to die in a burning jail cell (after she tries to free Callisto), and can even catch Xena’s ‘round-killing-thing’ (thanks, Diana, for that classic name for the chakram!). What sets Callisto apart from other villains is that she’s no liar, as evidenced by her brutal honesty with Xena when she asks what Callisto (who she captured after a horse chase across a beach) would do if set free. She tells her outright that she’d kill everyone she cares for...including Argo (which Argo understandably objects to hearing, and this is after having had Callisto attempt to escape by kicking the ribs of him/her). This is but one of many Callisto ‘quirks’ that makes her so refreshing. There’s also the part where at times she almost appears turned on by Xena showing off her many skills, making you wonder if Callisto wants to kill Xena or have sex with her (maybe both?). Leick’s facial expressions say SO MUCH, but then she also relishes every deliciously evil line she spouts too and I love Callisto's twisted sense of humour (kudos to the show for casting someone who made such a stand-out villain). This^ isn't to say Xena is overshadowed (like so many heroes seem to be by memorable villains in shows/movies). Lucy Lawless, as always, gives a stellar performance with her reaction when hearing the name of Callisto's village (Cirra) and especially when confessing to Gabrielle in a campfire scene that's one of the instances where her army *was* responsible for the deaths of women/children, showing her guilt over how the deaths of Callisto's family made her the way she is. Renée O'Connor also deserves props in this scene, as Gabrielle makes Xena promise that if anything ever happens to her, Xena won't continue the cycle of hate/vengeance. It's a memorable scene and the chemistry between both actresses is undeniable just like it is between Lawless and Leick (albeit quite a different sort of chemistry). While I get some objecting to self-proclaimed 'Joxer the Mighty' being introduced in this otherwise pretty 'serious'/'dark' episode...I think that the entire point was to counter the darkness. He's a doof who keeps trying to take on Gabrielle (in an effort to prove himself to 'Warrior Queen', Callisto, after Xena's rejection of him offering his help) and he thoroughly gets his arse handed to him by Gabby on multiple occasions (which she points out to him), his armour's like a bunch of pots and pans constantly clanging together anytime he moves and his backup weapon in the TINIEST DAGGER EVER. One could accuse Ted Raimi's casting of being 'nepotism', but there are glimmers of Joxer having *some* depth to him. He refuses to kill Gabrielle at Callisto's behest (her increasing impatience with him amused me), thus proving that although he's often buffoonish, he's also a decent person. The Xena/Callisto ladder fight is one of the show's stand-out fights thus far (yes, it may defy physics...but no more than the show usually does). Clearly Callisto admires Xena's creativity in fashioning a ladder seesaw. You know what the mark of a true psychopath is? Meeting their fate, ie. seemingly plummeting to their death, with LAUGHTER (another similarity to Ledger's Joker). Though WTF was up with the falling whistle sound effect? Ignoring that part, this was easily one of the show's best episodes.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 7, 2022 12:07:55 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 2, Episode 5: 'Return of Callisto'. Psycho Barbie returns... **spoilers below** Imprisoned, Callisto's secured to a chair contraption, takes a beating...which she's thankful for, *not* because she gets off on it (not this time, anyway), but because it allows her to steal a knife to free herself with, then teaches the guards a lesson in treating prisoners properly. I liked the camerawork during her escape, including the slow-motion focus on her feet busting free (foot fetishists would’ve likely enjoyed that. Treasure the moment, as it’ll probably be the only chance to see Hudson Leick’s bare feet). Newbie guard, who's being shown the ropes, has the WORST FIRST DAY EVER on the job and is made short work of, then Callisto delivers on her earlier promise to make the "fat pathetic piece of dung"/head guard squeal like a pig after he called the inmates 'pigs' ("Here piggy-piggy-piggy-piggy." has never sounded so creepy). Although she tells her henchman, Theodorus, to free the prisoners, she clarifies only the healthy ones (who’ll form her new army), while the weak ones are to be ‘put out of their misery’ (Hudson’s hand gestures, covered with her victims’ blood, are delightfully unhinged). Perdicus/Perdicas (sp?) receives a welcome from Xena’s fist, as he's apparently decided to make a midnight proposal to Gabrielle in the woods after being all broken up about killing three men in battle (that’s all?) and somehow managing to survive in war despite his anti-killing beliefs thanks to picturing Gabrielle’s face. Xena’s as much in shock over this proposal as Gabrielle is...but Xena needn't worry, as he's clearly not long for this world/practically got ‘Dead Meat’ stamped on his forehead. ‘Joxer the Magnificent’ (a name he should seriously rethink, as it hasn’t the same ring to it as ‘Joxer the Mighty’...nor does it lend itself to becoming a catchy theme tune) is displaying his non-fighting skills to a couple of kids. Callisto shows considerable restraint in NOT offing them, but that’s because she wants Joxer (who, to his credit, stands up to Callisto) to deliver her message to Xena. It’s refreshing to have the villain include themselves when talking about whose hands every drop of blood they spill will be on (as usually they just pile ALL the blame on the hero who spared their life), thus showing she’s not absolving herself of her sins. Speaking of, she’s about to add another child to her casualty list when Xena steps in, catching her chakram (in a shot mirroring when Callisto caught it during her introductory episode). There's some sword foreplay between them, with Callisto taking advantage of Xena’s heart/caring about people, but she makes the fatal villain mistake of not killing Xena when she's at her mercy. Hudson/Lucy have great chemistry. I kind of love that Callisto not only does her signature primal scream when fighting, but also likes to backflip out of scenes whilst doing it as well. During a battle with Callisto’s men, Mr. Hates-Killing kills a guy, then drops his sword/leaves himself totally vulnerable mid-battle...yet no baddies take advantage of this (not even when Gabrielle joins him), they just keep running past. This foolishness somehow convinces Gabrielle to marry his drippy self. At the wedding, there’s some amusing stuff between Xena/Joxer, but most of note is Xena's/Gabrielle's not-goodbye, their hug, and their KISS. Both Lucy and Renée are really good in this scene, saying so much with looks. Your new husband admitting he’s been with other women (Gabrielle’s apparently a virgin), though clarifying that he never said he was good at it, is something I’m sure EVERY bride wants to hear on their wedding night. Anyway, this is the scene to take your toilet break. It always amuses me when Xena tells those she puts her ‘pinch’ on that they only have seconds to live; yet they're alive for minutes/able to think straight enough to relay important information as Theodorus does here, leading to Xena interrupting Callisto’s attack on the newlyweds by kicking her in the boobs. I enjoyed Callisto’s “Hm?” when Xena says she won’t get the satisfaction of killing her best friend...and then she basically kicks her towards Gabby’s stupid hubby and Callisto does Xena the BIGGEST favour ever by offing the dope. Her “That’ll do.” is great, she screams by way of goodbye, and Xena’s look says she's totally grateful...or maybe that she won’t make the mistake of sparing Callisto’s life again, I can’t tell. Gabrielle's blinded with rage, wanting Callisto dead (with or without Xena's blessing/help), even going so far as to blame Xena for never teaching her sword-fighting skills. I admired Xena's restraint in not losing it at Gabrielle when she started poking her with her sword. After some parrying lessons, Xena prays to whatever gods will listen for Gabrielle to not lose her innocence...which Gabrielle sees. She then lies to Xena's face, before going after Callisto alone despite Xena's matter-of-factly stating how outmatched she'd be. We earlier learned Callisto doesn't drink booze because she enjoys experiencing life 'in all its agonising glory'. Her chair contraption/'throne' doesn't look very comfortable, nevertheless she's asleep on it when a sword's put to her throat. Gabrielle's unable to follow through, Callisto looks genuinely confused as to why she couldn't do it, and I forget how Xena winds up strapped to Callisto's 'throne', but she tells Xena to appreciate it. Thanks to bumbling Joxer providing distraction (by getting himself shot with an arrow), Xena frees herself, she's pretty evenly matched with Callisto fighting-wise, and racing horses along the beach seems to be their 'thing'...only this time with added chariots. It's an impressive scene that ends with them stuck in quicksand and Callisto takes solace in thinking they'll die together...that's until Xena proves just how good she is by getting herself out of it. Callisto admires Xena's skills/quick-thinking/initiative, before turning on the innocent girl voice/act, asking (then begging) Xena to save her, but Xena's learned her lesson and Callisto dies the same way she lived: screamingly. This was an excellent episode and Hudson Leick was exceptional throughout, bringing so much complexity to Callisto's character. If you've seen the episode, it's totally worth watching/listening to Lucy Lawless and Renee O'Connor's commentary.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 9, 2022 3:31:18 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 2, Episode 7: ‘Intimate Stranger’. After all that sexual tension, Callisto FINALLY gets to be inside Xena... **spoilers below** There've been dreams-within-dreams before, but how often are there dreams-within-dreams-within-dreams? Xena/Gabrielle are going after Callisto’s men in the woods. You’d think Xena would immediately know something’s amiss when her mother randomly appears. It's Ares (who apparently enjoys disguising himself as Xena’s parents despite having a thing for her...which is weird) and he’s making her feel guilty about serving as ‘judge/jury/executioner’ regarding Callisto, who also randomly appears, drowning in quicksand, once again begging for Xena's help, before saying she *is* Xena, then blaming her for passing judgement on her whilst claiming she could’ve changed just as Xena did. The sword in Xena’s hand suddenly has a mind of its own, stabbing the helpless Callisto (despite Xena fighting it). Dream Callisto’s scream snaps Xena awake...or does it? When she turns over a slumbering Gabrielle, who becomes a freaky black-eyed dead Callisto, it’s revealed Xena’s still dreaming. Gabrielle wakes her up and Xena’s feeling pretty guilty, asking her what her opinion on the whole matter is. Gabrielle seems normal to begin with...but then it’s all aboard the guilt train, as her reassurance turns into blame, basically calling Xena a hypocrite, saying that if Hercules had treated Xena the way she treated Callisto, she’d be dead (and would deserve it MORE). When Xena FINALLY awakens for realsies, I’m surprised she didn’t immediately blurt out, “Oh, COME ON!”. Xena has lots to feel guilty about, like killing innocents, but killing a psycho murderer? I love Callisto, but even *I* understood Xena’s decision to let her die (after having given her several chances). Callisto’s men are using Joxer as a piñata until Xena easily scares them off, there’s an amusing bit with him asking if she can cut him down without dropping him on his face, she says “No.”, and the floor acts as the camera lens as Joxer face-plants it. After a not-very-helpful nighttime chat with Gabrielle, Xena sees Callisto giving her the ‘come hither’ finger motion, then suddenly she’s in the underworld where Callisto explains to her there’s a fine line between Tartarus and the real world, and now thanks to her new best friend, Ares (who appears), she’s got a chance to escape. He’s helping her after having given up trying to turn Xena back into her bad self, they pile the guilt on Xena who finally admits to murder and this is all Callisto requires before spinning Xena around like they’re on the dancefloor, except this dance ends with her slamming into a big rock. She pokes Gabrielle awake and it's immediately obvious what's happened, but we’re subjected to Callisto-as-Xena snogging Ares to make it blatantly clear. In Tartarus, Xena-as-Callisto convinces Hades of who she is and he grants her a 1-day free pass to reclaim her body/send Callisto back down or she’ll take her place permanently. Up top, despite Ares warning her to steer clear of Xena/wait it out until the day's up, Callisto's fixated on making her suffer (it's too bad they had to write Callisto this way, as usually she's pretty smart). Firstly, she offs Theodorus (for badmouthing her behind her back to who he *thought* was Xena), then she teaches Gabrielle to embrace that bloodlust she once had for Callisto by fighting a tree, and lastly she wants to burn all the people from Xena's village (including her mother) as payback for Xena doing the same to her family. Lucy Lawless definitely makes an effort to change her voice/mannerisms/walk to illustrate she’s not Xena, but I did think it was more exaggerated than how Hudson Leick plays her. So much for Gabrielle being Xena’s BFF, as she just shrugs off 'Xena' acting weird. Clearly horses are smarter than people, as Argo's no dummy and is constantly whinnying to warn Gabrielle. Figuring the horse might out her, Callisto-as-Xena sends Gabrielle away and then taunts poor Argo (when she said "Poor dumb animal", you just KNOW Argo was thinking, "I'M not the dumb one! I knew it was you all along!"), splashing her in the face, before slashing her/the camera. Kill all the humans you want, Callisto, but leave animals alone! This scene leads to Joxer getting a heroic moment when he interrupts Xena-as-Callisto as she’s trying to save Argo with some plants/sap and is willing to die to protect Xena's horse. She easily flips him out of her way, as nothing's going to prevent her from saving Argo (who she knows Callisto was trying to force her to put down). Xena-as-Callisto’s way of convincing him she’s Xena is by using her ‘pinch’ on him after asking whether he’s ever seen Callisto use pressure points (considering Callisto's obsessed with Xena, how'd he know she hadn't picked up some of Xena's skills?), then thanks him for standing up to who he *thought* was Callisto on Argo’s behalf. Hudson Leick really had the more difficult job this episode, as she can't let loose as she usually does, but instead has to be restrained/calm (without making her performance flat/boring). She's at her most 'Xena-y' later on when she answers Gabrielle's question of whether she's really Xena with a very Xena-esque "Yeah." whilst holding Gabrielle's shoulder. How'd she convince her? Gabrielle interrupted Xena and Callisto fighting in each other's bodies, Xena-as-Callisto had a knife to Callisto-as-Xena's throat, and what Gabrielle said at the start of the episode about not having dreamed since her hubby's death was something Callisto obviously didn't know, she then fled. Before being pulled back to Tartarus, Xena-as-Callisto manages to put Callisto-as-Xena asleep, they're both in the underworld and now it's time for a little payback (guilt-style) in the form of Callisto's victims (plus her mother) making her feel bad for all the unnecessary killing she did. Callisto-as-Xena spins into the big rock, Xena's freed from Tartarus...but remains stuck in Callisto's body. Gabrielle says this'll take some adjusting to, then tells her of the story she dreamt, starting with "I sing the song of Perdicus/Perdicas; the boy I knew, the man I loved"...and Xena's probably wishing she was back in Tartarus.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 10, 2022 12:29:51 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 2, Episode 8: ‘Ten Little Warlords’. At playing Callisto, Hudson Leick excels...but playing Xena she also does exceptionally well. **spoilers below** Xena-in-Callisto’s-body still freaks out Gabrielle, who suggests she dye her hair. This is the first of several instances throughout the episode where Xena hauls Gabrielle away. Their intruder is just Joxer delivering an invite supposedly from Ares that’s meant for Callisto, but Xena points out Ares knows about the body-swap/that Callisto’s in Tartarus, thus the invite’s from someone posing as Ares. Joxer asks Gabrielle if she’s got the hang of the whole Xena/Callisto thing she says "About half the time.") and makes a crack about her pretending to be a fierce warrior stuck in the body of Gabrielle (dude, she’s kicked your arse MULTIPLE times!). Speaking of ‘ass’, Gabrielle’s ready to kick some when spying two warlords who, by Xena’s account, HATE each other...yet they're getting along/teaming up. Two competing fishcake salespeople try to entice Gabrielle to buy their produce, then play tug of war with her before she starts beating them up, causing other villagers to fight and a flying lobster (which Xena catches. The way Hudson Leick looks at this ridiculous thing so seriously amuses me, as does her grabbing Gabrielle by the ear). What’s causing all of this unusual aggression? Ares, who’s now a drunken hobo, has apparently lost his sword. Gabrielle’s eager to take on Ares now he’s mortal, he amusingly shoves her away, Xena teaches him what he thinks is ‘pain’ (he reckons it's not so bad), then he learns what REAL pain is from the wine-soaked-rag Xena instructs him to press on his bloody lip (clearly she’s enjoying any little bit of payback she can get). Speaking of inflicting hurt on others, Gabrielle’s beating up bar patrons and even puts Xena’s ‘pinch’ on one before knocking them out (did she release it or did they die?). I enjoyed Kevin Smith’s portrayal of newly-human Ares, as it showed off his comedic chops, plus he had excellent chemistry with Hudson Leick’s Xena. Ares promises to give her body back if she helps him reclaim his sword, but says what I was thinking when he comments how ‘magnificently’ Xena’s wearing Callisto’s body (I think how she styles her hair makes quite a difference). We get a look-in at what Callisto-in-Xena’s-body is up to in Tartarus, Ares attempts to play on Xena’s longing to get her body back, but she seems to have accepted her situation, saying her body doesn’t make her who she is, her deeds do. So then Ares changes tactics, blaming the lack of there being a God of War for the normally-peaceful-people suddenly turning violent. Gabrielle’s getting more and more irritable, Xena tells her to recite a poem she likes whenever she’s mad (which she does, currently feeling 'boiling mad' and voicing her true feelings regarding Xena-in-Callisto’s-body), then tells her to stay behind, as she’s going to help get Ares’ sword back in order to stop everyone totally losing it/killing each other. After they jump one warlord to gain his invitation, they’re instructed to leave weapons behind as they board a ship, then a message from ‘Ares’ plays via spinning thing (which actual Ares says sounds nothing like his voice), claiming one of the ten warriors aboard will get to become the new God of War. Some of the warlords boast about besting Xena, but she puts them in their place (complete with Callisto-style hissing). Then Joxer arrives to get himself killed, but Xena saves him by thanking him/instructing him to ‘guard the dock’, then proceeds to scream in his face and he amusingly pretends to be scared of ‘Callisto’ before fleeing. After Ares learns about hangovers, he and Xena hear an ominous growling coming from the castle they're headed for (unbeknownst to them, Gabrielle's ignored Xena's wishes and followed them in a boat with Joxer). Once there, faux-Ares reveals himself to be Sisyphus (who's supposed to be pushing a rock uphill for eternity in Tartarus), he's unaware 'Callisto' is actually Xena and then outs Ares to everyone, before saying whoever bests the noise-making monster will get to be the new God of War. The main flaw in this plan is immediately evident when they draw numbers for the order in which they'll get a crack at the monster. Xena gets first shot at it, some warlords take exception to that, infighting/casualties ensues, Ares gets injured (which he's already sick of), and this leads to an excellent scene between him and Xena. She quickly works out the weapons they've been provided with are little use against a monster/Sisyphus wants them to off each other. As she's bandaging Ares, he says she's still got her Xena touch, whereas Callisto's 'all animal'/'starts like a cold fish' until you 'press the right buttons', then it's 'quite a ride'. After bringing up his unique experience of being with Callisto-in-Xena's-body (totally glossing over consent issues, though Xena says she'll need to take a long bath once she gets it back), Ares reckons he's never lied to her and she's 'inspired' him to change...but she ain't buying it. Hudson's/Kevin's sizzling chemistry is off-the-charts during this scene. Sadly, they're interrupted by more warlord-offing-warlord action, they kindly move the bodies as they keep piling up, Ares wants Xena to claim the sword/become Goddess of War should he not last, but she wants none of it. Meanwhile, Gabrielle's losing her mind...which is no surprise, with Joxer as company. He maintains he's keeping it together...then loses it at a fly. They confront the 'monster'...and it's just a stone-faced fan that Joxer stops with a stick (before laughing dementedly). After Xena saves Ares from a trap involving being hung upside-down over a fiery pit with spiked walls closing in, they both fight/kill the remaining warlords, Gabrielle and Joxer appear (informing them the 'monster' is total BS), Xena reunites Ares with his sword, his godhood's restored and he kicks Sisyphus' arse back to Tartarus. At first it appears Ares has reneged on giving Xena her body back...but eventually he does, and I'm sad to see Hudson Leick leave the role after her outstanding performance as Xena.
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Post by hyundaifromyuggoth on Mar 10, 2022 19:50:00 GMT 1
Note: Unlike with my Riverdale and Agent Carter episode reviews, I won't be doing reviews for EVERY episode of X: WP. Most likely I'll just be reviewing the ones which feature the character of Callisto (since she's a favourite of mine). Though I may, on occasion, feel inclined to review other non-Callisto episodes...it'll just depend on whether I'm in the right mood to do so). So without further ado, here's my first review... Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 1, Episode 22: 'Callisto'. Callisto: Warrior Queen... **spoilers below** Having grown tired of/frustrated with current TV shows' agendas/mandates, it's nice to return to a simpler time (when shows could just be shows) thanks to X: WP repeats airing on TV here. I haven’t seen these early episodes since the days of buying them on VHS (I missed out on getting the first two seasons on DVD, so these repeats are the only way I can see them). And I’m SO glad I finally got to relive the episode that introduces one of my Top 5 TV characters EVER (no, not Joxer). Things open in pretty dramatic fashion with a village burning and people being slaughtered by a flash of black leather & blonde hair that even a child doesn’t escape the wrath of (though whether he actually DIES is unclear, since he seemed to be dead dead, but then opened his eyes which indicated he was only mostly dead. However, later Melas talks about losing a son…were they the same kid?). ANYway, what matters the most in the opening scene is how the incomparable Hudson Leick commands the screen from the very moment we first get a good look at her. The way she addresses an old woman as “You old crone” (before telling her to pass on the message that Xena is the one they have to thank for all this destruction) amused me. This is a classic frame job and character assassination of Xena’s reputation she’s trying so hard to redeem. Consequently, when she introduces herself to Melas, he wants her blood as payback...and he sure doesn’t give up easily, even when Xena bests him without breaking a sweat on more than one occasion. His main purpose it to be the catalyst to Gabrielle's ‘break the cycle of hate/vengeance’ big speech later on. The introduction of Callisto is memorable for a number of reasons, but mostly for bringing Hudson Leick to my attention when I originally watched it on TV. Many have played psychos, but none of them quite like ‘Psycho Barbie’ (as I once saw her described). Leick, as with Heath Ledger in TDK, gives us an R-rated performance in what's otherwise PG-rated. Seriously, you wonder how they got away with such a dark character in a series that also includes such goofiness/silliness. What Leick does is more than play a psycho mirror version of Xena. She adds many layers/creates complexity within this self-described ‘monster with integrity’. She's as beautiful as she is evil, trains with her men like Xena did in her debut episode of H: TLJ, (but on ladders!), her primal scream is a twisted alternate take on Xena’s war cry, she hisses like a feral cat on multiple occasions, leaves Xena to die in a burning jail cell (after she tries to free Callisto), and can even catch Xena’s ‘round-killing-thing’ (thanks, Diana, for that classic name for the chakram!). What sets Callisto apart from other villains is that she’s no liar, as evidenced by her brutal honesty with Xena when she asks what Callisto (who she captured after a horse chase across a beach) would do if set free. She tells her outright that she’d kill everyone she cares for...including Argo (which Argo understandably objects to hearing, and this is after having had Callisto attempt to escape by kicking the ribs of him/her). This is but one of many Callisto ‘quirks’ that makes her so refreshing. There’s also the part where at times she almost appears turned on by Xena showing off her many skills, making you wonder if Callisto wants to kill Xena or have sex with her (maybe both?). Leick’s facial expressions say SO MUCH, but then she also relishes every deliciously evil line she spouts too and I love Callisto's twisted sense of humour (kudos to the show for casting someone who made such a stand-out villain). This^ isn't to say Xena is overshadowed (like so many heroes seem to be by memorable villains in shows/movies). Lucy Lawless, as always, gives a stellar performance with her reaction when hearing the name of Callisto's village (Cirra) and especially when confessing to Gabrielle in a campfire scene that's one of the instances where her army *was* responsible for the deaths of women/children, showing her guilt over how the deaths of Callisto's family made her the way she is. Renée O'Connor also deserves props in this scene, as Gabrielle makes Xena promise that if anything ever happens to her, Xena won't continue the cycle of hate/vengeance. It's a memorable scene and the chemistry between both actresses is undeniable just like it is between Lawless and Leick (albeit quite a different sort of chemistry). While I get some objecting to self-proclaimed 'Joxer the Mighty' being introduced in this otherwise pretty 'serious'/'dark' episode...I think that the entire point was to counter the darkness. He's a doof who keeps trying to take on Gabrielle (in an effort to prove himself to 'Warrior Queen', Callisto, after Xena's rejection of him offering his help) and he thoroughly gets his arse handed to him by Gabby on multiple occasions (which she points out to him), his armour's like a bunch of pots and pans constantly clanging together anytime he moves and his backup weapon in the TINIEST DAGGER EVER. One could accuse Ted Raimi's casting of being 'nepotism', but there are glimmers of Joxer having *some* depth to him. He refuses to kill Gabrielle at Callisto's behest (her increasing impatience with him amused me), thus proving that although he's often buffoonish, he's also a decent person. The Xena/Callisto ladder fight is one of the show's stand-out fights thus far (yes, it may defy physics...but no more than the show usually does). Clearly Callisto admires Xena's creativity in fashioning a ladder seesaw. You know what the mark of a true psychopath is? Meeting their fate, ie. seemingly plummeting to their death, with LAUGHTER (another similarity to Ledger's Joker). Though WTF was up with the falling whistle sound effect? Ignoring that part, this was easily one of the show's best episodes.
Callisto was an awesome character!
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 13, 2022 5:07:25 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 2, Episode 14: 'A Necessary Evil'. How is it Hudson Leick/Callisto manages to *still* look good even with a big-ass scar on her face? **spoilers below** Gabrielle gives Ephiny the Amazon Queen mask now that she's leaving and asks Xena whether an Amazon Queen beats a Warrior Princess. Ephiny's got no appreciation for Gabrielle’s sense of humour (then again, Gabby's ‘joke’ about Amazon parades isn’t particularly funny, whereas Ephiny’s deadpan response actually *is*). They're interrupted by a screaming Velasca, who’s miraculously survived her impalement from last episode (Xena's SO surprised, she makes head whooshing noises for no reason) and politely put up with all that pain on her long walk back just so she could make a big show of eating the Jell-O/ambrosia (which we see THREE TIMES) that creates swirly lightning around her face, gives her all-white eyes, and seemingly makes her a GIANT...except not. Amazons get blasted by Velasca's Emperor-like lightning fingers, Xena saves Gabrielle/Ephiny and is apparently the only one to realise that retreat is the SMART option, so Ephiny makes a cuckoo call (which probably confused some birds). Xena also notices Velasca's momentarily weakened when using her powers. I know Velasca was the show’s attempt to give Gabrielle her very own nemesis...but, honestly, Melinda Clarke just seems to be using playing a god as an excuse to overact/yell a lot. She’s no Callisto, that’s for sure. Again, Ephiny’s great at understated humour, as her response to Xena telling her to get more cannon fodder/Amazons to delay Velasca is, “Shouldn’t be a problem. I think I’m high on her list of things to do.”, and after pointing out Xena's dislocated arm (which she hasn’t even noticed), I loved Xena making it 'all better' by casually ramming it into a wall, then showing Ephiny (whose simple “Yeah.” response amused me). Gabrielle maintains she's ‘alright’ with being #1 on Velasca’s hit list...but clearly isn’t. Xena’s expression after realising she knows where she can 'find an immortal to fight an immortal' tells us everything. Cut to Callisto who, after her crossover to Hercules’ show (where he scarred her with fire/trapped her), is unfairly putting all her ill-will towards Herc on a poor innocent rat (which she reassures ISN’T food). Hudson Leick (deservedly receiving ‘Special Guest Star’ status this episode) brilliantly plays how cuckoo-for-cocoa-puffs Callisto’s become with her line deliveries, rocking back and forth as she strokes the rat before letting it free (only to end its life) and disturbing laughter. Understandably, Gabrielle’s p.o.’d at Xena’s solution. Meanwhile, the Amazons lure Velasca into a trap that, non-surprisingly, achieves very little. There's excellent creepy music playing/atmosphere as Xena’s lowered into Callisto’s ‘little resort’ and calls out her name, receiving a reply that would unnerve most people. As Callisto always does, she flips her way into the scene, before catching Xena up on what’s occurred with her, sounding even MORE unhinged than usual. I loved Xena’s threat about being able to “still do damage. How’d you like to spend eternity in five pieces?”. Callisto agrees to help Xena after being promised a shot at some ambrosia. She greets Gabrielle in her unique Callisto way, earns a staff across the face (which obviously has no effect) for asking if Gabs has any new hubbies, then shows just how crazypants she is, helping inflict pain on HERSELF by plunging her sword into her own midriff (neat effect!) and pulling it out like some bizarre party trick. Immortals don't bleed and heal fast (except in pieces, apparently). I enjoy Gabrielle's antagonistic dynamic with Callisto, who's adamant about them making 'a wee little stop' (leading to one of the episode's BEST scenes). In a village, Callisto's forced Xena to confess her past sins, starting with "Some call me the Warrior Princess. Some call me murderer." (not 'the space cowboy'?), then admitting to burning Callisto's village of Cirra/killing everything there/destroying young Callisto's soul. Lucy's great with Xena's guilt/confession, but Hudson's acting throughout is something else. Just watch her expression change, as at first Callisto takes joy in watching Xena confess, but then she appears to show FEELINGS. The look she gives Xena says SO MUCH. The villagers just want to get back to their lives; Xena's all business, whilst Gabrielle's freaked out at Callisto displaying human emotions. Elsewhere, Velasca's ranting/raving at Artemis, destroying her temple and obviously DOES believe in 'killing the messenger'. At a canyon, Callisto suggests she and Xena both eat ambrosia so they can fight each other for eternity. Xena seems amused by this prospect, while I'M amused by the looks/winks Callisto gives Gabrielle (and her reactions to them). When Velasca arrives, Callisto seemingly betrays Xena and tries to make a new friend, but Velasca's not interested...even when Callisto warns her Xena's tricking her into draining her powers (Callisto shoving Velasca to the ground like they're kids on the playground amused me). Callisto reteams with Xena, their synchronized swordfighting pushes Velasca back, and by the combined power of Gabrielle's staff/Xena's chakram, Velasca's buried under rocks. The excellent campfire scene that follows involves Gabrielle/Callisto trading questions. Gabrielle asks whether she felt anything back at the village. Callisto claims she feels nothing/only 'bits and pieces', and Gabrielle even looks to be sympathising, but then there's that twisted Callisto humour as she asks her how long it took her hubby to die. Velasca-as-a-tornado tracks them down, Xena's plan is to get her onto a rope bridge/dump her into the lava pit below. Gabrielle ends up hanging from it after gaining possession of the ambrosia and, at Xena's behest, gives it to Callisto who eats it greedily, becoming a god and doing a freaky tongue thing whilst saying, "Here comes trouble.", testing her lightning against Velasca's. Neither one notices Xena cutting the rope bridge and just continue throttling each other as they fall into lava. After Xena's death-defying leap (that's shown THRICE!) to save Gabrielle, she asks Xena whether she thinks Callisto felt sorry about the things she'd done. Xena's blunt "No!" is amusing, but Gabrielle disagrees and thus forgives Callisto so she can move on. Apparently lava turned Callisto/Velasca into bronze statues (accompanied by reused footage of their faces from minutes ago hovering above).
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 19, 2022 11:28:44 GMT 1
This is not only my favourite ‘comedic’ episode of the show, but also remains my favourite time-loop episode of ANY show EVER - hence why I’m reviewing it despite it not being an episode featuring Callisto (like my previous reviews have been). Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 3, Episode 2: 'Been There, Done That'. Go to sleep, Xe-e-na, the day is long... **spoilers below** In a stable, Xena's rudely awakened from her slumber by a rooster crowing and Joxer entering/being his usual annoying self (though he's nice enough to bring Gabrielle goose eggs), we learn Gabrielle's not a morning person (her "I'll rise, but I refuse to shine." is how I am) and Joxer gets hit with a horseshoe from above resulting in him literally having egg on his face (Gabrielle NOT telling him she doesn't even like goose eggs, as he volunteers to get more, is a dick move). A Montague/Capulet-like feud plays out in town, leading to Joxer bravely/foolishly intervening and then dying in Gabrielle's arms as a result (this is a prime example of the show expertly turning on a dime from humourous to serious). Speaking of arms, Gabrielle falls asleep in Xena's while Joxer's body burns on a pyre...though Joxer fans shouldn't fear, as he's very much alive by morning. Xena's actually relieved, amusingly giving him a noogie/doing a shadow boxing-like maneuver (complete with comical facial expression) and thinking it was all a dream...until Joxer's hit with the horseshoe again (this time on his foot, after Xena tells him to step back). Gabrielle's attempt to understand Xena's explanation is amusingly confusing, Joxer gets philosophical/intuitive as he theorises they're all just part of someone else's thoughts/imagination, then faints upon hearing of his own bloody death...but springs back up at the mention of Gabrielle crying over him. She and Xena answering "Yes." in unison to him asking whether they think he'd be stupid enough to get between two guys with swords is funny, but what's not funny is this time around one side of the fighting families punish Xena for seemingly 'siding' with the other by killing ALL the horses in the stable (after the horseshoer refused to tell them which was hers). Thankfully, we're spared seeing the carnage. Xena's heartbroken reaction's enough. Joxer nobly takes the blame for Argo's death (clearly Xena's more upset by it than she was by Joxer's), but luckily Argo's ALIVE when the day restarts. Xena tries to spare Joxer from getting egg-face, but his continual questioning her leads to the same result. She's frustrated at again having to explain the day repeating and knows the warring families have something to do with it. Joxer says 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend', suggesting they can be the enemy that brings the families together (understandably, numerous people have bonded over their mutual hatred of him in the past). Xena learns one family member, Casca, got hit by a cart and resolves to save him. The next time around, Joxer doesn't even get to finish his "Rise and shine!" greeting, as Xena knocks him on his arse whilst rushing to rescue the old deaf Casca...which she does, but his hat isn't so lucky. While Gabrielle's again attempting to understand everything, Joxer suggests Xena staying awake all night as he sings to her (which I found pretty funny, as well as her losing patience with him whilst trying to remain calm/polite). Xena denies any Fates/Ares/food/poison darts/Bacchae bites involvement regarding her behavior, leading to the famous "Is that a hickey?" question from Joxer (Gabrielle's reaction answers that). Apparently saving Casca changed nothing, the families still fight over anything/everything and this time Gabrielle dies. Whilst grieving, Xena tells herself it'll be alright. The amusing sound coming from the pile of hay, when Xena sticks her hand into it the next morning, confirms Gabrielle's alive. Joxer seeing them embracing/wanting to get in on the 'group hug' (when he's clearly not invited) is great too. Although I hate animal violence, him suggesting that the rooster's to blame and Xena offing it with her chakram (complete with resulting explosion of feathers) is pretty funny, as is Xena's angry yelling when this doesn't fix things. In one loop, Xena informs Gabrielle of Joxer's affections and he's embarrassed, but naturally neither of them remembers this later. Family feuds keep happening despite Xena's best efforts to stop them; she learns someone's used fatal night's bane poison and Joxer gets to put his plan/annoyingness to good use in having the families come together to shoot arrows at all three of them. But not even DEATH is enough to put Xena out of her misery. What follows is the BEST moment of the episode, which is her just finally being fed-up with Joxer and burying her chakram in his chest (knowing full-well he'll be fine). Without an explanation for this, Gabrielle's understandably shocked, the moment's clearly played for laughs and obviously this was intended to give all Joxer-haters what they'd wanted ever since his introduction. While it could've been viewed as 'mean-spirited', it's well-done/actually hilarious. As is the next loop starting with Xena leaving the stable after having tied up Gabrielle/Joxer to keep them out of trouble (Gabrielle's face is highly comical). This time around Xena does some serious investigating, trying to find out who bought the night's bane and being subjected to crunchy/unappetizing-looking muffins as she finds out how the two families are connected. With this new information, the following loop begins with Xena happy/enthusiastic, her amusingly answering Gabrielle's/Joxer’s questions before they've even asked (particularly of note is her expression when answering one question with “Yes, both ways.”) and making peace between the two houses. Xena’s convinced this fixed everything...so, naturally, when she loops again, her EPIC temper tantrum is understandable. Even better is her seemingly having gone crazy, as she leans on her head whilst upside down and explains the events thus far to Gabrielle/Joxer who just sit there with the same comical expressions on their faces from morning till nighttime. Xena learns that a Romeo/Juliet-like couple (plus Cupid) are responsible for the time-loop, while her math/geometry skills and chakram are the heroes of the episode that finally break the time-loop. Xena grabs Gabrielle's turnips, which Joxer brought instead of eggs, and the episode ends with a freeze-frame of them laughing at him after he's hit in the head by a hammer instead of a horseshoe. If you've seen the episode, it's worth watching this vid which includes interviews with Lucy Lawless, Renee O'Connor and Ted Raimi about making it.
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Post by AQUA CAT! on Mar 19, 2022 18:28:57 GMT 1
At the time I watched the episodes, probably when I was 9-10 years old, I was dead certain that Callisto was the most beautiful person who ever lived. It was love at first sight every time she appeared onscreen. It made sense to me at the time that she could have been assembled by a bunch of the Gods working around the clock in a lab on Mount Olympus.
I don't remember too much about the episodes. I'd love to see them again, or own them on DVD so I have the option. The last I saw of Callisto, I think she was fighting Xena on or near a rope bridge over a river of lava for some Ambrosia. It's been so long. Too long.
If this message board had the IMDb emoticon of the hearts beating out of the eyeballs, this is where I would put it.
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Post by hyundaifromyuggoth on Mar 21, 2022 14:11:56 GMT 1
This is not only my favourite ‘comedic’ episode of the show, but also remains my favourite time-loop episode of ANY show EVER - hence why I’m reviewing it despite it not being an episode featuring Callisto (like my previous reviews have been). Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 3, Episode 2: 'Been There, Done That'. Go to sleep, Xe-e-na, the day is long... **spoilers below** In a stable, Xena's rudely awakened from her slumber by a rooster crowing and Joxer entering/being his usual annoying self (though he's nice enough to bring Gabrielle goose eggs), we learn Gabrielle's not a morning person (her "I'll rise, but I refuse to shine." is how I am) and Joxer gets hit with a horseshoe from above resulting in him literally having egg on his face (Gabrielle NOT telling him she doesn't even like goose eggs, as he volunteers to get more, is a dick move). A Montague/Capulet-like feud plays out in town, leading to Joxer bravely/foolishly intervening and then dying in Gabrielle's arms as a result (this is a prime example of the show expertly turning on a dime from humourous to serious). Speaking of arms, Gabrielle falls asleep in Xena's while Joxer's body burns on a pyre...though Joxer fans shouldn't fear, as he's very much alive by morning. Xena's actually relieved, amusingly giving him a noogie/doing a shadow boxing-like maneuver (complete with comical facial expression) and thinking it was all a dream...until Joxer's hit with the horseshoe again (this time on his foot, after Xena tells him to step back). Gabrielle's attempt to understand Xena's explanation is amusingly confusing, Joxer gets philosophical/intuitive as he theorises they're all just part of someone else's thoughts/imagination, then faints upon hearing of his own bloody death...but springs back up at the mention of Gabrielle crying over him. She and Xena answering "Yes." in unison to him asking whether they think he'd be stupid enough to get between two guys with swords is funny, but what's not funny is this time around one side of the fighting families punish Xena for seemingly 'siding' with the other by killing ALL the horses in the stable (after the horseshoer refused to tell them which was hers). Thankfully, we're spared seeing the carnage. Xena's heartbroken reaction's enough. Joxer nobly takes the blame for Argo's death (clearly Xena's more upset by it than she was by Joxer's), but luckily Argo's ALIVE when the day restarts. Xena tries to spare Joxer from getting egg-face, but his continual questioning her leads to the same result. She's frustrated at again having to explain the day repeating and knows the warring families have something to do with it. Joxer says 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend', suggesting they can be the enemy that brings the families together (understandably, numerous people have bonded over their mutual hatred of him in the past). Xena learns one family member, Casca, got hit by a cart and resolves to save him. The next time around, Joxer doesn't even get to finish his "Rise and shine!" greeting, as Xena knocks him on his arse whilst rushing to rescue the old deaf Casca...which she does, but his hat isn't so lucky. While Gabrielle's again attempting to understand everything, Joxer suggests Xena staying awake all night as he sings to her (which I found pretty funny, as well as her losing patience with him whilst trying to remain calm/polite). Xena denies any Fates/Ares/food/poison darts/Bacchae bites involvement regarding her behavior, leading to the famous "Is that a hickey?" question from Joxer (Gabrielle's reaction answers that). Apparently saving Casca changed nothing, the families still fight over anything/everything and this time Gabrielle dies. Whilst grieving, Xena tells herself it'll be alright. The amusing sound coming from the pile of hay, when Xena sticks her hand into it the next morning, confirms Gabrielle's alive. Joxer seeing them embracing/wanting to get in on the 'group hug' (when he's clearly not invited) is great too. Although I hate animal violence, him suggesting that the rooster's to blame and Xena offing it with her chakram (complete with resulting explosion of feathers) is pretty funny, as is Xena's angry yelling when this doesn't fix things. In one loop, Xena informs Gabrielle of Joxer's affections and he's embarrassed, but naturally neither of them remembers this later. Family feuds keep happening despite Xena's best efforts to stop them; she learns someone's used fatal night's bane poison and Joxer gets to put his plan/annoyingness to good use in having the families come together to shoot arrows at all three of them. But not even DEATH is enough to put Xena out of her misery. What follows is the BEST moment of the episode, which is her just finally being fed-up with Joxer and burying her chakram in his chest (knowing full-well he'll be fine). Without an explanation for this, Gabrielle's understandably shocked, the moment's clearly played for laughs and obviously this was intended to give all Joxer-haters what they'd wanted ever since his introduction. While it could've been viewed as 'mean-spirited', it's well-done/actually hilarious. As is the next loop starting with Xena leaving the stable after having tied up Gabrielle/Joxer to keep them out of trouble (Gabrielle's face is highly comical). This time around Xena does some serious investigating, trying to find out who bought the night's bane and being subjected to crunchy/unappetizing-looking muffins as she finds out how the two families are connected. With this new information, the following loop begins with Xena happy/enthusiastic, her amusingly answering Gabrielle's/Joxer’s questions before they've even asked (particularly of note is her expression when answering one question with “Yes, both ways.”) and making peace between the two houses. Xena’s convinced this fixed everything...so, naturally, when she loops again, her EPIC temper tantrum is understandable. Even better is her seemingly having gone crazy, as she leans on her head whilst upside down and explains the events thus far to Gabrielle/Joxer who just sit there with the same comical expressions on their faces from morning till nighttime. Xena learns that a Romeo/Juliet-like couple (plus Cupid) are responsible for the time-loop, while her math/geometry skills and chakram are the heroes of the episode that finally break the time-loop. Xena grabs Gabrielle's turnips, which Joxer brought instead of eggs, and the episode ends with a freeze-frame of them laughing at him after he's hit in the head by a hammer instead of a horseshoe. If you've seen the episode, it's worth watching this vid which includes interviews with Lucy Lawless, Renee O'Connor and Ted Raimi about making it. Yes, I remember this one is hilarious!
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Post by taylorfirst1 on Mar 21, 2022 16:20:16 GMT 1
I don't care what anyone says, "Xena Warrior Princess" is one of the greatest shows of all time.
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Post by hyundaifromyuggoth on Mar 21, 2022 18:45:00 GMT 1
I don't care what anyone says, "Xena Warrior Princess" is one of the greatest shows of all time. Yeah, it was mostly cheesy, campy fun, but there were some really good serious episodes. I really enjoyed that musical episode where they went to Illusia (or something) when Xena and Gabrielle were trying to kill each other. And I hate musicals.
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Post by ArArArchStanton on Mar 22, 2022 3:00:57 GMT 1
I love this chalice!!! Greta idea and it’s fun to me because it’s a show I didn’t catch much of but also has some nostalgic appeal. I look forward to reading these
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 25, 2022 11:16:46 GMT 1
At the time I watched the episodes, probably when I was 9-10 years old, I was dead certain that Callisto was the most beautiful person who ever lived. It was love at first sight every time she appeared onscreen. It made sense to me at the time that she could have been assembled by a bunch of the Gods working around the clock in a lab on Mount Olympus. I don't remember too much about the episodes. I'd love to see them again, or own them on DVD so I have the option. The last I saw of Callisto, I think she was fighting Xena on or near a rope bridge over a river of lava for some Ambrosia. It's been so long. Too long. If this message board had the IMDb emoticon of the hearts beating out of the eyeballs, this is where I would put it.
That's^ roughly around the age I was when I watched the show too. I'd watched Hercules: The Legendary Journeys when it first came on the air and was really into it. Then they introduced Xena and her 'redemption' which led to her getting a spin-off. The age I was, I don't think I even knew about spin-offs at that stage, so this was something new to me. Anyway, I enjoyed in just as much as H: TLJ and then by the time Callisto was introduced, X: WP had surpassed Herc's show (for me). Your description of seeing Callisto pretty much matches my own reaction to her. I do seem to have a bit of a thing for the 'crazy hot chicks', as not many years later I felt a similar way about Faith on Buffy the Vampire Slayer when she was introduced. Still, Callisto was my first onscreen love and no one's ever been able to replace her in my eyes as the best villainess I've seen in a TV show. Her wicked sense of humour (that was oftentimes morbidly amusing) is just my style of humour. Having said that, if anyone but Hudson Leick had played the role, I'm not sure I would've fallen as hard for her as I did. Hers was a unique performance and it's just a shame she never really had much success after the show (that I know of). Funnily enough, apparently she became a yoga instructor (can you imagine Callisto + yoga?). I haven't watched any of the episodes of either H: TLJ or X: WP in a LONG time, but after I saw that Callisto's first episode was airing via repeats on TV, I just HAD to check it out since I don't own the first two seasons of X: WP on DVD (I only have seasons 3-6). So while I missed the majority of Season 1 on TV, I managed to tune in at just the right time to catch my fave character. Since then I've finished the first two seasons on TV and am now towards the end of my Season 3 DVDs. I've just rediscovered how great this show was and am watching several episodes in a row (though trying not to go through them TOO quickly, as I know eventually they'll run out). As for H: TLJ - the stupid channel which airs both shows on TV here didn't sync them up properly, so Season 2 of Herc's show is airing on TV at the same time Season 3 of Xena's show is...and that's totally out of order. Herc should be into it's fourth season when Xena's third season is airing, but of course the channels here don't care about that sort of thing. All they care about is putting in a million ads (another reason why I'm glad I've switched over to my X: WP Season 3 DVDs - I don't have to worry about fast-forwarding through ads anymore. However, since I don't own ANY Herc DVDs, I'm still having to record his show's episodes and fast-forward all the ads, which is annoying). The episode you described^ where you last remember seeing Callisto from the X: WP Season 2 episode 'A Necessary Evil', which was the episode I reviewed above^ the 'Been There, Done That' episode. Speaking of... Yes, I remember this one is hilarious! Yes, it is - which is why it remains my favourite 'comedic' episode of the show. It's one I've rewatched many times and it STILL cracks me up. I jsut wish I could've found a GIF of Xena's epic chakram throw she does in the episode (at one point the chakram's like a pinball machine). I don't care what anyone says, "Xena Warrior Princess" is one of the greatest shows of all time. After refreshing my memory of the show via rewatching it after MANY years...I'd have to agree. It actually had some real smart writing, great dramatic moments, some genuinely hilarious comedic stuff and several excellent actresses/actors in important supporting roles as well as, of course, the two series leads. I think that group of actor/actresses in the show elevated a lot of the material, but I just rewatched a two-parter in Season 3 where they go to Chin a...and it was like a Xena movie. This show reached some of the highest highs....I'm just dreading the lowest lows (which I know are yet to come, though I just have my first episode that I rewatched a loathed, as it introduced a character I couldn't stand the first time I watched the episode when it originally aired...and my opinion of them didn't improve the second time around. They're the BAOLUTE WORST character in the show. Thankfully, I don't think they're ever brought back again. Anyway, this^ is my long-winded way of saying I agree with your opinion of the show. Yeah, it was mostly cheesy, campy fun, but there were some really good serious episodes. I really enjoyed that musical episode where they went to Illusia (or something) when Xena and Gabrielle were trying to kill each other. And I hate musicals. I actually don't mind musicals...if the songs are catchy/memorable and the singers can actually SING. While Xena's musical episode mightn't be as 'refined'/'polished' as BtVS's was...it still laid the groundwork for that show's musical and this one must be given props for taking a huge risk in doing something that hadn't been done in many (if any) TV shows at that point in time. Was it perfect? Certainly not, but it still made an admirable effort...and it's one of my next two episodes I have reviewed.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 25, 2022 11:21:17 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 3, Episode 11: 'Maternal Instincts'. Callisto dusts off her ‘Kiss the Cook’ apron... **spoilers below** Xena and Gabrielle return to where Xena’s son, Solan, lives with the centaurs. He's still hopeless, but Xena/Gabrielle humour him. The new actor playing Kaleipus the centaur is definitely an improvement over who came before, bringing dignity to the character. Elsewhere, a girl-who’s-totally-Hope is playing with her ball that she ‘accidentally’ drops down into the lava pit where Callisto was trapped with Velasca, thereby ‘unintentionally’ freeing the former...but not the latter (apparently Velasca was originally intended to return, but Melinda Clarke wasn’t available, so things got rewritten. Just as well, as I think her inclusion would've made the episode cluttered). Callisto appears in spectacular fashion, goddess that she is, and the girl-who’s-totally-Hope's eyes roll back in her head as she seemingly faints (twice). After Ephiny’s lame ‘surprise’ for Gabrielle (it’s just Ephiny, her centaur son and Solan), she senses Gabrielle’s troubled and sends the kids outside to play, but not before taking her son’s pretty awesome-looking wooden wolf named Lucas from him so he doesn’t lose it (smart!). Gabrielle mentions the wooden lamb she gave her own child...which, oh btw, she had and then 'lost', but doesn’t elaborate. Meanwhile, Callisto thinks the peace totems for the treaty that’s going on with the centaurs are ‘pathetic’, roasts them, then does the same to some sentries after giving them a deliciously evil look/grin. After her talk with Ephiny, Gabrielle’s smart enough to realise the-girl-who’s-totally-Hope is hiding in the room...but not smart enough to keep her defenses up and immediately buys into this intruder’s ‘innocent’ act, as she says a ‘monster-lady’ gave her a message for Xena (who’s WAY ahead of everyone else, knowing Callisto’s behind the dead sentries). The girl-who’s-totally-Hope delivers Callisto’s message to Xena (which is basically that Callisto knows about/is going to off Xena's son). Xena plans to hide Solan in some caves, Gabrielle wants to send the totally suspicious child messenger there too…but she’s disappeared. Cut to her reporting back to Callisto (who’s pretty funny with how intense/rough she gets brushing the kid’s hair whilst relishing the pain she plans to cause Xena by offing her son). It’s soon revealed the girl is Hope (*GASP*), as she flings the brush away using her powers, going on about her father, Dahak. Solan claims he’s not a baby...yet acts like one, as those who care about him want him safe in the caves. Gabrielle's bumps into Hope again, causing her to ‘accidentally' drop her wooden lamb, FINALLY clueing Gabrielle in on who she really is...though, of course, doesn't bother to TELL anyone. Keeping secrets never ends well, Gabrielle. Xena’s leading someone-in-a-cloak-who's-totally-not-Solan through the woods when she smells burning, Callisto appears/flirts with Xena, making various fire-related puns/remarks and there's this morbidly amusing dialogue from her where she sounds flippant about her own murdered family, saying Xena ‘barbequed’ them, then she’s all “Now it’s MY turn to host the cookout!” and Solan’s ‘the guest of honour’. Hudson Leick's delivery is great. Once she discovers it isn’t Solan in the cloak, Callisto’s disappointed reaction/Hudson’s delivery of “...Gabrielle.” is hilarious. She then gives away that she isn't working alone. Speaking of, Hope's currently offing poor Kaleipus in the caves (it’s a testament to the actor's performance that I actually care about his character dying after spending so little time with him, though he’s annoyingly vague with his dying description of his killer to Xena). The kid playing Hope is decent. The one playing Solan? Not so much. Though he gets a good scene with Xena (Lucy Lawless does all the heavy-lifting in their scenes together), talking about how everyone he cares for dies. She still doesn't inform him she’s his mum, but nevertheless he wants to travel with her and Gabrielle, which she eventually agrees to (thus spelling his doom). Hope's in the caves, weakened after using her powers to kill the 'half-assed old man' (which explains her earlier 'fainting'), and Callisto wants to kill Solan herself, but Hope threatens to take away all she promised her if she does...so then Callisto amusingly plops down beside Hope, doing these funny shifting-in-place movements whilst sitting, and Hope says their target is the children. When Hope next talks to Gabrielle, she plays her mum like a fiddle and this ends with Gabrielle foolishly sending her to 'the safest place there is'...which ain't so safe for Solan, who probably thought he'd found himself a girlfriend (that's until she looks at him murderously). Gabrielle informs the others of Callisto's kill-the-children plan, Xena's suspicious and they get into an argument that results in Gabrielle revealing Hope's still alive. LL does some excellent acting here after the reveal of Hope/learning that Gabrielle sent her to where Solan was. She finds him quite dead, yells at Gabrielle to get out, then screams. Hudson Leick gives a nuanced performance as Callisto soaks up Xena's grief...but her reaction changes and it's clear that she's NOT fulfilled like she'd hoped. Even though earlier Solan’s name was mentioned in front of Hope SEVERAL times, her slipping up that she knows it is apparently enough evidence to motivate Gabrielle to FINALLY do what she should've done to begin with: ie. off the demon-spawn (with poison she tips into a wineskin). Callisto now seems so over everything, not even mustering up much reaction to Xena shooting her with an arrow/icy glare. Others join in, Callisto becomes a pincushion, but then she screams and her eyes/face light up, shooting the arrows out of her back at the archers. She follows Ephiny and the children into the caves, then gives a great speech to Xena about how nothing's changed even after getting her vengeance against her. She hardly even puts up a fight as Xena releases all her rage, tricking Callisto into blasting lightning everywhere and collapsing the cave onto herself, trapping her as Xena backflips/flies out. She sees Hope's covered body (though did she see Gabrielle consider drinking the poison/offing herself too?). Both mothers watch their kids burn on funeral pyres. LL and ROC totally sell their characters' grief/rift.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 25, 2022 11:24:58 GMT 1
I love this chalice!!! Greta idea and it’s fun to me because it’s a show I didn’t catch much of but also has some nostalgic appeal. I look forward to reading these Thank you, Arch. I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read my reviews (and especially anyone who braves my pic/GIF/video collages located below each review inside the spoiler tags).
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 25, 2022 11:32:41 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 3, Episode 12: 'The Bitter Suite'. The precursor to Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s ‘Once More, With Feeling’... **spoilers below** Naked Gabrielle's in a sweat hut getting her butt whipped with a plant. Apparently that's the Amazon way of helping her work through the pain of losing her child/being partially responsible for Xena losing hers. It’s interesting seeing Joxer interacting with Ephiny (Ted Raimi gets to do some ‘serious’ acting), as he thinks Gabby’s had enough while Ephiny begs to differ. Meanwhile, Xena’s off wailing on snow-covered mountains when Ares appears, making an inappropriate (albeit amusing) comment about her ‘nice vocal’ not being something one can dance to, though she gets him back by calling him a "soulless bastard". He's encouraging her to return to her murderous ways, basically saying “Faster, pussycat! Kill! Kill!” whilst pointing her in Gabrielle’s direction. Callisto never fails to entertain me, as she appears to Gabrielle, caressing her face...then slaps it (should've slapped her butt instead!). She's whispering in her ear/turning her against Xena (who she reckons ruined both their lives and was the reason Gabby got demonically-impregnated, so it’s all HER fault), and eventually Gabby admits she HATES Xena. The next scene's super-intense, with Xena whipping poor Argo whilst galloping in, Ephiny trying to reason with her (getting a broken arm for her trouble) and then ordering the Amazons to attack. There should’ve been at least *one* Amazon who was like, “Screw this! I’m not fighting Xena!” and fled...which is exactly what Joxer tells Gabrielle to do once she’s regained consciousness and he’s no longer carrying her in his arms (after having displayed his usual bad timing, emerging from her hut just as Xena was demanding Gabrielle’s whereabouts). Joxer seeing the bloodlust in Xena’s eyes/his “Oh, shit!” expression amuses me, but he gets to be heroic by at least trying to protect Gabrielle from Xena. Naturally, he’s no match for her and he's lucky she took it easy on him. Once she lassos Gabrielle’s legs with her whip, I’m glad they made a point of showing her getting on a horse that’s NOT Argo (who’s probably glad to not be party to the famous ‘Gab-drag’ that follows). The dragging itself is well-done, as Xena takes Gabrielle for a ride through the countryside after dragging her through the elements of fire, rock and water. She’s about to see if Gabrielle can fly through the air, holding her former friend’s limp/beaten body above her head and screaming “Vengeance!” (complete with crazy eyes), but Gabrielle awakes, kicks Xena in the face and effective use of slow-mo is used to get across just how major this moment is, with Xena having been about to KILL Gabrielle who declares her hatred for her would-be murderer and then tackles her, sending them both off the cliff into the water below. We’re then treated to some poetry (about life/fish) by the unmistakable voice of Hudson Leick, who pulls the naked Xena out and FINALLY Callisto gets to snog Xena after all this time! Yes, it’s the kiss of life, but whatever. She’s dressed as Aleph/‘The Fool’ from Tarot cards (other tarot images are depicted by various characters) and it’s quite trippy seeing Callisto looking decidedly UN-Callisto-like with her smiley-ness, blonde-bob-haircut-combined-with-green-dress-and-red-tights getup, bag-on-a-stick-with-a-BLINKING-EYE and little white fluffy talking/singing dog. While Hudson Leick doesn't do her own singing, she provides the ‘talking’ bits of her song and I think the actual singer's voice matches it well. My favourite parts are Callisto’s expression when she’s crouched down, gazing up at Xena’s naked backside, and then once the song’s over, Xena grabbing her by the ear (the way Hudson does this smile as Xena tugs on her ear cracks me up) and Hudson's almost-squeaky “Ow!” when she’s tossed to the ground. Everything in between? Well, it’s certainly KOOKY with the spinning Wheel of Fortune, and the dubbed singing’s good (less so the unpleasing-to-the-ear-singing-creatures), as is Hudson's lively performance. The song itself? Meh. Meanwhile, naked Gabrielle's fished out of a river by an upside-down-Joxer-as-the-Hanged-Man. Her mistaking the Land of Illusia for the Elysian Fields/her line about how "Only heroes wind up here. Dead heroes. Dead naked heroes." as she becomes aware of her nakedness amused me (as did this version of 'Joxer the Mighty', which I remember ALL the words to/I think is the most 'polished' version of the song, thus making it my favourite), then Hangman-Joxer creates her a dress from grass. Xena's praised-through-song by warriors who can't sing that well (though them peeking out from behind their shields as they chant "Xena!" is funny). Whereas Kevin Smith/Ares-as-the-Emperor, spinning around on a throne, thankfully can sing. Sadly, the actress playing Gabrielle's sister (Lila) cannot...though gives it a go anyway. While Xena's surroundings are dark/gloomy, Gabrielle-who's-now-dressed-as-the-Empress is in bright/cheery surroundings...but is amusingly provided with a scythe/told that killing Xena would be 'kind'. Unfortunately, she's outmatched by Xena-as-the-Queen-of-Swords. A blue-lipped-Joxer-as-the-Hermit declares Gabby's deadness, Xena-as-Death gets serenaded by Ares (his parting line, "Nothing more need be said. Ding-dong, the bitch is dead." is unexpected/morbidly amusing), Callisto-now-dressed-as-Justice asks-in-song if Xena feels any better, Xena expresses regret upon realising what she's done as an alive Gabrielle appears to make her feel guilty. Xena justifying it as having killed an 'illusion' non-surprisingly doesn't comfort Gabrielle. They're transported to the Hall of Echoes, where they yell accusations/blame at each other for the past, a flaming Wheel of Fortune appears, once again Gabrielle's menaced by fire/pulled towards it, ending up on an altar with bloodied hands, reminded of her first kill. A low-rent Dementor (Torment) floats through the air, summoning cloaked figures (Caesar, Khrafstar, Callisto, Ares...plus black-eyed/'dark' versions of Xena/Gabrielle who're about to break the legs of/stab real Xena/Gabrielle). They sing about hate winning, but Xena and Gabrielle explode them with their song about love/forgiveness or whatever (LL can sing, while ROC's singing is obviously dubbed). Torment's revealed as Ming T'ien (who Gabrielle learns Xena killed), he's destroyed, Solan appears, Xena finally tells him he's her son. Once this unfinished business is settled, Xena/Gabrielle end up back home on a beach, laughing together, their friendship having been magically mended by the power of song! If you've seen the episode, it's totally worth checking out the commentary with Lucy Lawless and Renée O'Connor. They're very funny (and at times very hearfelt) with the things they have to say about thepisode (plus, hearing Lucy's amusing comments said in her thick New Zealand accent somehow makes them even funnier).
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Post by ArArArchStanton on Mar 25, 2022 12:10:33 GMT 1
I love this chalice!!! Greta idea and it’s fun to me because it’s a show I didn’t catch much of but also has some nostalgic appeal. I look forward to reading these Thank you, Arch. I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read my reviews (and especially anyone who braves my pic/GIF/video collages located below each review inside the spoiler tags). I think it seems fun in this (and I hope this comes across as a positive), shot at a ten fair sort of way. It’s small, it’s relaxed, it’s straight forward. Sometimes I just love fantasy type things like Willow without the massive budgets behind it. Good stuff
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Mar 31, 2022 7:49:21 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 3, Episode 21: 'Sacrifice'. What's Callisto's least-favourite genre of music? I'm guessing 'rock'... **spoilers below** A pig (is that Porkules’ girlfriend?) watches as the vortex Hercules threw Callisto into opens, familiar hands appear, followed by a torso (I'm imagining this is how she emerged from the womb), before she screamingly dives out, basically declaring her sheer awesomeness being why it couldn’t contain her (I don't disagree). It appears she's going to get her cookout after all (the pig's either very dumb or paralysed with fear as it just stands there/squeals), but instead of frying some bacon, Callisto simply shoos it away with her finger. Her pouty expression as she strokes her neck (minus the hind's blood pendant), watching the pig flee, amuses me. We cut to dancing-midriffs-of-scantily-clad-mask-wearing-women-who're-apparently-NOT-Amazons and priests who’re about to sacrifice Gabrielle’s childhood friend, Seraphin, until Xena intervenes (considering how annoying Seraphin is throughout the episode, they should’ve just let it happen). Xena offs some priests, then Callisto stops by for a little priest-throat-slitting before disappearing. Xena/Gabrielle think the worship/sacrifices are for Callisto, who’s taken the 'Priest of the Flesh’ into a cave where there’s some really disturbing sounds going on. Hudson Leick somehow manages to make words such as ‘pumpkin’ and ‘flesh’ (when she’s talking about carving up the PotF like he’s a Sunday roast) sound so fun/interesting. Ares, creeper that he is, freely admits to having been watching Xena all this time. He asks her about the hind’s blood, she expositions about Callisto having killed Strife with it, he’s offended that someone-not-born-a-god wants to be like the rest of them and Xena DGAF about his concern for himself/other gods. Sacrifice Time, Take 2! The cultists think the PotF's gone to a better place, now it’s time for Priestess of the Blood...who's actually Xena in disguise, whooping butt until Callisto arrives. The following is an excellent scene, as there’s SO much history between their characters, which both Lucy/Hudson convey. Xena asks to hear Callisto’s plan, but she’s doesn't fall for that classic villain mistake. Again, Hudson seemingly relishes every word/makes the most of her dialogue, whether it’s her 'tsk-tsk-tsk’ at Xena or saying ‘decoration’ (in reference to her sword), which she says SO deliciously while fighting/flirting with Xena. When Callisto wonders if she’s toying with Xena or vice versa, it sounds totally flirtatious, then her annoyed reaction/scoff upon realising Xena’s actually delaying her is quite funny. She sends a fireball Xena's way, but Ares gets hit instead as he materialises (amusingly patting out his flaming chest), wanting vengeance against Callisto for using him/killing Strife in the H:TLJ crossover. Callisto blows Ares a kiss...albeit loaded with a fireball, he catches it/shoots it back, she dodges, grabs the head priest, then disappears. Xena figures out this is all about Hope, Seraphin continues being annoying as she praises the murderer of Xena’s son...earning her a well-deserved-sword-pointed-at-her-face-whilst-essentially-being-told-to-STFU by Xena (Seraphin appears satisfyingly rattled by this). Ares reappears, he's all for Xena killing Hope, and wants her leading his army...which she wants no part of. Callisto’s preparing to sacrifice the head priest (who Hudson Leick likened to Sméagol from LotR in her commentary for the episode), but learns that won't work/it's Seraphin's blood that's needed. Meanwhile, Ares prepares to assemble the 'largest army ever'...which somehow I doubt will actually happen. Not just because of this show's budget, but also because he's visited by a pillar of flame (wonder who THAT could be?). Gabrielle/Seraphin reminisce boringly before Seraphin walks off all offended-like after learning Gabrielle is Hope's mother. Apparently that 'better place' the PotF went to involved his flesh being stripped from his bones/used to mold Hope's cocoon/egg (when Sméagol-priest's surprised Callisto knew to do this, she's all like "It's pretty self-explanatory."). Callisto wants Sméagol-priest to translate/speak egg, ensuring Hope knows why 'Auntie Callisto's' doing all this for her (ie. she wants oblivion in return). Note Hudson’s rubbing-the-palms-of-her-hands-together movement as Callisto expresses her need for her own existence to just be OVER already. Seraphin's still boring, things improve once Xena locates the cave, Callisto's "Oh, she's so good." is almost sexual in Hudson's delivery. They flirt/fight some more, Xena chops off Callisto's hand (eliciting an amusing "Ouch! Don't do that."), which she instantly regrows. I love Callisto's half-bow/arm-sweep whilst saying, "Welcome to my world...now get ready to leave it!". She's smart enough NOT to fall for Xena's attempt at getting her to use her powers, thereby bringing the cave down upon herself/trapping her like last time. Unfortunately, what she DIDN'T see coming was Xena having a hidden shield outside the cave, which she uses to bounce back Callisto's fireball that she hurls (Hudson's delivery of, "Can you say...nighty-night?" followed by her magnificent scream is awesome), causing her temporary-burial-under-rocks after all. Before Xena can kill Eggbert, Ares disappears with it back to his pad. Obviously his chat with Daddy Fire Pillar's got him making with the nice-nice since he's letting cocooned-Hope sit upon his throne, saying he's forgiven her/Callisto for killing Strife and trying to kill him too. Seraphin's Priestess-of-the-Blood-ness attracts Dahak-worshipping-zombie-villagers; Xena fights them whilst Gabrielle hides Seraphin in a hut. There's a great moment where Seraphin stubbornly won't leave, so Xena punches her lights out, before flying straight up through the roof (carrying the unconscious nuisance on her back!), Once she's awake, Seraphin's BS seems to be working on Gabrielle, who lets her go free...but it's all an ELABORATE RUSE to lead Xena/Gabrielle to where Hope's at. Ares kidnaps Gabrielle, calling in his favour for getting her to Chin ahead of Xena, saying the Fates will cut Xena's life-thread (making amusing scissor-cutting-noises/finger-gestures) if she kills Hope. Xena fights Sméagol-priest...who Seraphin gets her fool self stabbed by, she wipes her blood on the cocoon (which Gabrielle prevents Xena from killing), Callisto appears, Hope hatches in gloriously gross/gooey detail (the sound-effects are particularly note-worthy). She's got her mother's eyes...and everything else (she's Gabrielle's doppelgänger). Xena/Gabrielle look shocked, while Callisto-being-Callisto finds it highly amusing. I'll forever remember reading somewhere that Hudson hilariously said all the goo was "yeast infection and snot". While this episode was mainly setup-for-Part-II...it was entertaining setup. If you've seen this episode, you should DEFINITELY check out Hudson Leick's commentary for it (she does one for Part II as well). She's quite hilarious, and obviously has a similar sense of humour to the character she plays. I especially love when she recites her own lines/reenacts certain moments while watching. If you weren't a fan of hers beforehand, then you most-assuredly will be after watching/listening to this.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Apr 3, 2022 1:53:22 GMT 1
Thank you, Arch. I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read my reviews (and especially anyone who braves my pic/GIF/video collages located below each review inside the spoiler tags). I think it seems fun in this (and I hope this comes across as a positive), shot at a ten fair sort of way. It’s small, it’s relaxed, it’s straight forward. Sorry, but I'm not quite sure I know what you were trying to say there^. Could you elaborate? Please forgive my slowness.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Apr 3, 2022 1:53:44 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 3, Episode 22: 'Sacrifice II'. Callisto finally feels Xena up (or down, rather)... **spoilers below** As Ares feels up Xena’s life thread with the Fates. Seraphin/Sméagol-priest bow before goopy Hope (whose head's somehow clean since our last shot of her), Callisto’s opening one-liner is about being "all misty-eyed” at the mother/child reunion, Hope uses her mind-powers to disarm Xena, and once again Hudson Leick has a way with words (in this instance, it’s the way she says the last two from her line “you just lost your one chance before she hatched, Xena.”). Gabrielle's attempts at warning Xena what happens if she kills Hope are ignored, Xena/Callisto fight (there's flashes whenever Callisto hits Xena...illustrating her godliness, I guess), Callisto creates a fireball, Xena warns her Hope’s using her/not to turn her back on her, Callisto retorts Xena’s speaking from experience (referring to Gabrielle) before getting her legs kicked out from under her so the fireball hits the roof, burying her underneath rocks for the umpteenth time. Xena's comeback? “Experience THAT!”. Hope/Gabrielle’s staring contest amuses me, as does Gabrielle shoving Seraphin aside when she’s blathering on. Xena chakrams Hope’s arm/makes her bleed, momentarily freeing Seraphin from Hope's mind-control, until Hope regains control/sends Xena’s chakram back at her. Clearly Hope’s a one-trick pony, preparing to fling further weapons at Xena who cuts down a shield from the roof as protection. Once free of her rockpile, Callisto's got a fireball with Xena's name on it until Hope yells her name (ROC's-voice-as-Hope is raspy/guttural) while Gabrielle stops Xena going after Hope (who Callisto whisks away). Pissed-off Xena hits Gabrielle where it hurts; basically blaming her for any blood Hope spills. Speaking of ‘hurt’, although Xena’s patching up Seraphin’s apparently-not-fatal-wound, it causes her some well-deserved-pain. It’s funny watching Seraphin's reaction to Xena saying she’d gladly die to be rid of Hope after Gabrielle informs her about the Fates getting all snippy-snippy on her life-thread. Xena kinda makes up for her meanness by saying Gabrielle’s the one she LOVES most in the world...but ruins the moment by saying she looks exactly like the one she HATES the most. Callisto’s interrupted mid-insulting-of-Gabrielle, as Hope wants to be made to resemble her mother. Callisto obliges, replacing Hope's goopy nakedness with Gabrielle’s look/outfit (complete with staff). Callisto’s uninterested/dismissive “Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, glory hallelujah!”, when Hope’s talking about her worshippers/Dahak-entering-the-world, is amusing. She wants Hope to kill her already, but Hope has further use for her (Xena was right, but Callisto's too blinded/doesn't see) who's not the only one that's become somebody’s bitch as evidenced by Ares kneeling before the roaring-flame-of-Dahak and amending his “joining you” comment to “serving you” after the flame growls angrily. Xena greets Sméagol-priest with “Welcome THIS!” (find a new theme, Xena). As she kicks priest arse, Ares appears to Gabrielle, reminding her what she already knows regarding the Fates and she awesomely calls him out on his new Dahak’s-bitch status. Callisto finds blasting heads-of-Ares-statues cathartic. Her expectant "Well, COME ON!" when he appears is funny. She's pissed at being left-out-of-the-loop by Hope regarding Ares joining their team and starts losing it (more than usual). You can tell by all her stressed-out-hair-touching. After her foot-stomping "I want it NOW!" tantrum regarding the hind's-blood-dagger, she gets into godly fisticuffs with Ares. Kevin Smith does a good job with his reaction to her reminding him she killed Strife and also gets the amusing line about Hope SO not being like her mother when the two of them snog as Callisto disappears, understandably disgusted. Xena/Gabrielle spy villagers-being-led-to-the-slaughter-by-Dahak's-priests. Seraphin, refusing to be used again, attempts suicide-via-cliff-jumping, Xena jumps after her/catches her, Callisto appears above, Xena hilariously tosses Seraphin through the air to safety, which Callisto applauds before calling a truce. Her describing Ares/Hope as "rolling around like weasels" is funny. Even funnier is Gabrielle being informed her daughter's "in heat". Callisto's dialogue throughout is great, including her "I scratch your back, you stab mine." deal she wants to make with Xena. Hope telekinetically breaks the stone railing where Hercules stashed the hind's-blood-dagger...it's gone. Joxer's whacked on the helmet/knocked unconscious by Seraphin-with-a-log (who fled after Xena saved her worthless arse) when he's attempting to stop the villagers-being-led-to-the-slaughter-by-Dahak's-priests. Callisto's following Xena, practically begging her to use the hind's-blood-dagger on her, Xena wants her to live with her suffering, Callisto says it's more a 'boredom thing', Gabrielle convinces Xena to accept Callisto's offer/help, while Joxer amusingly interacts with Hope-who-he-thinks-is-Gabrielle, as she wants him to describe his feelings for her/their 'relationship'. As Xena fights priests-attacking-villagers, Callisto hinders-as-much-as-she-helps, blasting priests and villagers alike, clearly enjoying herself whilst letting loose/burning things. Joxer knocks himself out with his sword in his attempt to stop her whilst Hope-pretending-to-be-Gabrielle-so-Xena-leads-her-to-the-dagger doesn't take too kindly to Xena saying Hope deserves to suffer. Xena's no fool, pulling a dagger on her, but Ares vamooses with her (Hope's powers are SO iffy/undefined. She telekinetically moves objects/breaks stone...but requires others to change her look/transport her places?). Joxer's typical clumsiness this time earns him particular nastiness from Xena. Ted Raimi elicits sympathy as Xena's yelling/abusing him/socking-him-in-the-face. He leaves like a kicked puppy. A deleted scene from the campfire chat between Xena/Callisto exists where Callisto explains she felt no pleasure/fulfillment upon hearing Xena-screaming-over-Solan's-body. It's, like, their BEST SCENE/should've NEVER been cut. Ares appears, Xena's worked out he's knocked-up Hope, Gabrielle refrains from barfing. Before storming Dahak's temple, Xena/Gabrielle basically profess their love, then Gabrielle meets with Hope, saying she wishes she'd finished her off (both really good scenes/well-acted). Once inside, Xena kicks arse/easily puts out the Dahak-flame by dropping a BIG BALL on it. Joxer gets a hero moment, tossing Xena the hind's-blood-dagger. Callisto blasts Ares/gives him yellow-flamed-skin. Xena advances on Hope, who telekinetically turns the dagger on her, but Xena regains control/is about to stab Hope when suddenly, after pole-vaulting-using-her-staff, Gabrielle embraces Hope, turning to face Xena, before plummeting into the lava pit below. Gabrielle's self-sacrifice gives Callisto the giggles, claiming it's given her reason to live...so Xena ends her life. Callisto's touching-Xena's-face-then-sensually-dragging-her-hand-down-Xena's-body-as-way-of-saying-thank-you/goodbye is PERFECT (as is the acting from Lucy, Renée and Hudson throughout). Everything shakes, Ares skedaddles, Xena/Joxer are sad. Here's Hudson Leick's commentary for the episode. It's just as hilarious as her one for the previous episode.
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Post by ArArArchStanton on Apr 3, 2022 2:04:03 GMT 1
I think it seems fun in this (and I hope this comes across as a positive), shot at a ten fair sort of way. It’s small, it’s relaxed, it’s straight forward. Sorry, but I'm not quite sure I know what you were trying to say there^. Could you elaborate? Please forgive my slowness. town fair. Not ten fair. Hope that makes it make more sense
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Apr 6, 2022 2:01:40 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 4, Episode 3: 'A Family Affair'. Big blue porcupine-looking monster children need love and affection too! **spoilers below** Some obviously-doomed-old-geezer walks through a moon-reflecting puddle in the woods, calling for his dog, Pluto. Goofy-without-clothes appears, barking warnings to his slow owner as monster noises are heard, then runs away. Sadly, I think Pluto’s monster-chow. The old fart fares no better, as evidenced by the bloody puddle. Meanwhile, Joxer’s removing old/dead flowers with new/fresh ones at the site of Gabrielle's death, saying a few words, then nearly soils himself as Xena grabs him, pulling herself up/out of the pit, vaguely explaining her vision-of-the-future being ‘evidence’ Gabrielle’s alive, before making the logic-leap that still-alive Gabrielle would immediately return to her hometown. In bright sunshiny Poteidaia, a puppet show entertains children...including Joxer, who amusingly sits down right at the front, blocking the view of those behind him. Everything goes into slow-mo, as Xena senses Gabrielle behind her...and it’s pretty obvious this is actually Hope-pretending-to-be-Gabrielle once again. Joxer literally gets in the way of their gazing-into-each-other’s-eyes ‘reunion'. Further evidence this isn’t the really-real Gabrielle is how she's SO happy to see him/snogging him (causing him to faint). While Xena’s emotion as she embraces 'Gabrielle' is very real, there’s something clearly off with ‘Gabrielle’s’ reaction. They discuss 'Gabrielle’ sending Xena messages she never got/the all-important question of how ‘Gabrielle’ survived. The flashback scene's like Gandalf-falling-with-the-Balrog in LotR: TTT...only with less-impressive effects. ‘Gabrielle’ voice-overs that she fell into a niche in the wall whilst Hope screamed out, “Why, mother, WHY?!” (maybe because you’re a hellspawn!), before supposedly hitting the lava. After regaining consciousness, Joxer leads Xena/Gabrielle to the bloodied-hand-of-old-dead-geezer dangling from a tree. ‘Gabrielle’ feigns shock/horror. She takes Xena home...and it’s not exactly a warm reception. They’re more welcoming towards ‘Joxer the Mighty’ (Gabrielle’s sister, Lila, clearly has a thing for him. Even Gabrielle’s mum thinks he’s ‘gallant'...which tells you just how questionable their taste/judgment is), while poor Xena’s awkwardly left alone with Gabrielle’s father, who blames her for everything bad that’s happened to Gabrielle. It’s a stormy night (a prerequisite for monster-hunting) and chook-on-a-hook is Xena's plan for luring the monster into the barn. It's shown in silhouette, then lowers itself down behind 'Gabrielle' (resembling Sonic the Hedgehog...if he were a dope-fiend), before blowing right past her to get at Xena, tossing her about (WHY toss your enemy away from you? If you've got your hand around their neck...just break it already! Quit giving them a head-start in escaping you!). She snares its arm on the dangling hook/scares it with a lantern, then she and ‘Gabrielle’ (who didn’t lift a finger to help Xena) run to the house. Spiky Smurf rams it, before puncturing various parts of the wall, narrowly missing Xena, then has her by the throat again but lets go/retreats due to the insta-dawn. Xena says she hurt it ('Gabrielle' ain't happy), then once the family leave the room, Xena informs Joxer the monster’s ‘The Destroyer’/Dahak’s grandchild and that ‘Gabrielle’ is actually Hope (*GASP*). Joxer doesn’t believe her at first, asking various questions, Xena says they have to keep up the charade of acting like Hope's Gabrielle to keep the family safe. Easier said than done, since Lila’s doing everything she can to unintentionally piss Hope off/make Hope want her dead, describing the 'thing' as ‘awful’/talking about Xena hurting it. Joxer mentions the whole if-Xena-kills-Hope-she-will-die-too deal Ares made with real Gabrielle, Xena reckons he released that debt, then reveals she didn't actually hurt Prickles/only said she did for Hope's benefit. She amusingly keeps Joxer occupied by tasking him with the all-important-job-of-sheep-counting. Gab-dad's still badmouthing Xena, then basically tells her 'Gabrielle'/Lila went "Out. For. A. Walk...Bitch.". Hope's obviously taking Lila to become monster-chow, but has to change tack once Xena ruins her plan...so she walks out onto a mostly-gone bridge, uses her powers to make it even-less-stable, then pushes Lila onto it as it breaks. Xena grabs it, and I was amused by Hope's totally unconcerned "I'll get father." before leaving them to die. Lila takes her sweet time grabbing Xena's hand, but at least thanks her for saving her life. In a cave, Hope's checking on Mr. Pointy (who must've been the MOST painful birthing ever), he repeatedly tries to hug her, she keeps telling him to stop, finally yelling at him, which causes him to accidentally scratch her. He cowers, but she regains composure/speaks soothingly as she discovers Xena tricked-her-into-believing-he-was-hurt. I already feel sorry for the poor guy, as Hope leaves him alone in the cave and he sadly calls out for her. Counting sheep's predictably put Joxer to sleep, he awakens to see Hope and follows her. As does Xena. The scene's well-done, as we cut between the two following her until it's revealed that Xena's actually been following the REALLY REAL Gabrielle, while Joxer ends up on the receiving end of actual-Hope's powers. This time the Xena/Gabrielle reunion feels real thanks to LL/ROC totally selling it. Gabrielle's clearly shell-shocked, a lot of what she says echoes what Hope-as-Gabrielle said about the plummet-into-the-lava-pit, she learns Hope's alive. Joxer's gagged/tied-up, hanging outside the cave as monster-chow (even uttering a muffled "Oh, shit."). Xena returns to the Gab-fam, Hope's there all battered/bruised, setting Xena up, then threatens the fam with her one-and-only-trick-of-levitating-weapons. Xena leaves, rescuing Joxer with her chakram...that sticks into a tree-trunk. Amusingly, she hits the tree to release it. Really-real Gabrielle convinces Lila of her genuine Gabrielle-ness. There's a cool-if-inexplicable-reveal-of-Hope-to-Gabrielle-via-a-mirror. They chat, Hope explains she survived thanks to daddy's-flame-reaching-up-and-saving-her, Gabrielle hilariously dives out the window. Xena lures Quillbert into the barn/fights him, Gabrielle pretends to be Hope (only NICER), clearly scared shitless whilst letting him hug her, and just as he's finally embraced...Xena literally stabs him in the back. Hope runs in, yelling, Pokey-man pokes her fatally...then turns, seeing Xena/Gabrielle standing together. Realising his mistake/that the big meanies tricked him into killing his own mama, he cries out, hugging her sobbingly. Hope hugs him back as they die together and haunting music plays. A sad ending for poor Spinosaurus. Xena/Gabrielle sit together, discussing Gabrielle 'finding her way' and Xena says Gabrielle's her way.
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Apr 13, 2022 9:32:51 GMT 1
Sorry, but I'm not quite sure I know what you were trying to say there^. Could you elaborate? Please forgive my slowness. town fair. Not ten fair. Hope that makes it make more sense
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Post by Chalice_Of_Evil on Apr 13, 2022 9:33:21 GMT 1
Xena: Warrior Princess - Season 4, Episode 8: 'Crusader'. Questionable choices in headwear should be the first clue someone's not all there... **spoilers below** A masked female rider interrupts her men getting beaten up by Xena/Gabrielle, pulling a fancy upside-down maneuver on her horse to trip Xena. After being kicked from her horse, she removes her mask...and it’s Kathryn Morris. She fights Xena, Gabrielle tries intervening, but gets kicked in the back/is about to be stabbed...until Stabby McStab hears voices/nods in understanding/gets all weepy, before lowering her sword/asking forgiveness. Gabrielle looks at Xena, whose reaction's pretty much “WTF's up with this weirdo?”. Weepy Weeperson introduces herself as Najara, saying she knows about them thanks to the voices in her head called ‘the jinn'...which is about all she knows regarding them (when doing the bidding of mysterious voices, maybe get more information?). When she says 'Bonacar!', I thought she was calling her horse 'Buttercup' (missed opportunity for a Princess Bride reference). She claims the jinn want Xena/Gabrielle to join her on her mission which is to ‘fight evil’, Xena amusingly asks for a more specific answer. In this case it’s a slave-trader named Marat. While Najara's enjoying the scenery (seems the term ‘stop to smell the flowers’ originated from her), Gabrielle asks her about the jinn, which she answers vaguely, saying they’re from ‘the light’. Najara (who's finally removed that unflattering hat she’s been wearing and looks SO much better without) sings along with her men, making self-deprecating jokes, then mentions the hospice she’s planning for anyone/everyone, its sole purpose being ‘relieving suffering’. Between her “so much good to be done, so little time to do it” line and offering her sword/command of her men to Xena whilst admitting she shouldn’t be so quickly trusted by Gabrielle…she’s clearly trying hard to gain skeptical Xena's trust. She helps Xena fight a raiding party in a village (her war-cry is rather boringly just her yelling. It’s certainly no Callisto scream), catches an arrow intended for Gabrielle before Xena can, then lectures the captured men on slavery being wrong/tells the villagers to forgive them. Xena’s remembering her future-crucifixion-with-Gabrielle-death-vision, which Najara knows about thanks to the jinn and she informs Xena only something ‘drastic’ will change it. Gabrielle *still* can’t get over Najara’s-arrow-catching-despite-the-fact-that-Xena-does-WAY-more-fantastical-gravity-defying/physics-defying-things-on-a-regular-basis, then gets excited by SWANS, which Najara invites her to go see up close. After declining Najara’s offer to join, Xena follows them/eavesdrops as they talk about Najara’s lovey-dovey ‘way’, she suggests Gabrielle start the hospice without her...but that’d mean leaving Xena, who Najara suggests Gabrielle totally commit to a life with, but Gabrielle admits she'll never get used to the violence that comes with being Xena’s travelling companion and then Najara’s all about Gabrielle’ making a "full commitment to the light”. When discussing hitting a slave centre, Xena/Najara disagree regarding Xena going after Marat alone, but Gabrielle talks Najara into listening to her. Later, Xena interrupts Najara praying to her invisible friends/voices in her head (who apparently come and go), wanting her to start her hospice, as she's planning to leave Gabrielle with her, hoping to avoid the death-vision. She admits Gabrielle gets hurt travelling with her, Najara agrees, Xena thanks her, then bids farewell to a slumbering Gabrielle. Najara again gives her 'light' speech to villagers/offers slave-traders the chance to convert...which Gabrielle wants to do. Meanwhile, Xena captures Marat sleeping, he mistakes her for Najara, then conveniently blurts out all the necessary information that lets Xena know Najara’s not-quite-so-lovey-dovey. She apparently gives those she captures three days to convert, if they refuse, she executes them without a trial (same goes for if she believes their conversion isn’t sincere). What a helpful slave-trader! Gabrielle’s initiated, then Xena interrupts more Najara-singing at a tavern, relaying to Gabrielle what she’s learned regarding Najara...who actually makes some good points to Gabrielle about the ones she ‘sends into the light’/kills being thieves/slave-traders/murderers/pirates, but Gabrielle’s hung-up on the whole ‘no trial/hearing’ thing. Najara rightly points out that those enslaved aren’t given any hearing/trial (I know Najara's being painted as the ‘villain’ here, but I agree evildoers don’t deserve what’s ‘fair’ considering the evil acts they commit aren't fair to their victims). Xena/Najara fight over Gabrielle (we see the footage with the breaking stairs that Alti showed Xena among her visions of the future), Najara fights well, but Xena still kicks her arse (on stilts!), then makes the uncharacteristic mistake of turning her back when she thinks Najara's defeated...paying the price for such carelessness, as Najara turns the tables/“whips her butt” (Xena's words). Gabrielle prevents Najara finishing Xena off by agreeing to go with her, admitting Xena’s darkness scares her, and they leave the beaten Xena who, once awake, pulls out a tooth/says this is what she gets for trusting someone who talks about being good all the time, but she knows Najara’s weakness is the same as her own...ie. Gabrielle, who Najara’s taken to a cave. They discuss Najara’s ‘wrong’ way vs Xena’s ‘right’ way (according to Gabrielle). Najara makes more good points about turning slave-traders over to local governments being useless if they support slavery and Xena killing most of her enemies in combat/rarely turning any over to authorities. Gabrielle maintains 'Xena only kills if it’s absolutely necessary’. Najara counters that she only kills evil people, asking what makes Xena any better? As if proving Najara's point for her, Xena seemingly kills her men outside. While Najara investigates, Xena sneaks in, Gabrielle amusingly points out how badly Najara beat Xena, then when Najara returns, Gabrielle's supposedly hanging from a rope above a chasm (though she's actually standing on something). Xena says Gabrielle's turned against her, claiming if she can't have her, nobody can. This time Xena beats Najara, who ends up hanging over the chasm/sees she's been tricked. Gabrielle stops Xena killing her, then there's the amusing sound of Xena knocking Najara out off-camera. Chained to a stake, Najara gets in one final dig about how hurting Gabrielle is Xena's job. Xena/Gabrielle leave as Najara forgives Gabrielle. Kathryn Morris played creepy zealotry well and I liked Najara better than other Callisto wannabes Xena's encountered, as she had more substance/complexity.
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Post by ArArArchStanton on Apr 13, 2022 11:40:37 GMT 1
town fair. Not ten fair. Hope that makes it make more sense It looks natural. Its low scale and lower budget but in a good way and utilized well.
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